Ins and Outs
It’s three days left until my Ghana trip and while everyone else is all set, my suitcases are empty. Weeks prior I had opened a new note on the notes app and wrote down which items I wanted to take along, what essentials to pack, and which outfits I would wear. From the little black dress to a mustard colored bikini set, it was all there. As I started packing, I quickly noticed that some of the things I was packing felt like unnecessary weight because I knew that I wasn’t going to wear them, so I deleted them from my notes app, going back and forth until my suitcase was all packed and ready to be tossed, rolled around and ridiculed until we finally reunited at the luggage belt at Kotoka Airport.
This had me thinking a lot about ins and outs, being in the new year and the longest month of January there has ever been. I looked at the list I had compiled for the new year. What I wanted in it and what I didn’t want anywhere near it.
Before the year started I had come to the conclusion that 2025 would be different. Patterns would be broken and new patterns would be formed, healthier ones. Now we all know the year changing is not a prerequisite for our lives to magically change, it’s much more about the inner work than the calendar changing.
So I brought a mental trash can and sorted out through behaviors and habits that I had become accustomed to and didn’t want to have with me in the new year.
What did I need to get rid of? Everything. No, I’m kidding not everything but major things that were dragging me down and not allowing me to be my best self like: consuming more than I create. Yes, I’m talking about doom scrolling on Instagram when I have a poem to finish, a newsletter to send out, videos to edit etc. I liked to escape into TikTok and Instagram and find myself in the deep trenches of Netflix and Disney+, binge watching series to a point where every free second was used to do that. The other big one was procrastination, constantly pushing everything to tomorrow and the next day, and the next month and the next year. The worst kind were tasks that could be accomplished in a matter of minutes or an hour or two tops but I would push them off and occupy myself with something completely different (*TikTok*). Leading to the other one that definitely had to go: Fear of failure and being stuck in the planning phase, these two went hand in hand like two best friends just walking along the beach causing trouble and misery… all these things were not benefiting me and not what I envisioned myself doing when I thought of who I wanted to become.
So if those were some of the things that I wanted to throw out; then what did I want to bring in? My top four would be Prayer, Confidence, Consistency and Creating and those are just part of the entire list. Why prayer? Why not?! Being in conversation with God is the best thing to set you up for everything good. Confidence, because without it I’m just a fly on the wall trying not to garner too much attention. Without confidence, it is impossible to create or be consistent, self doubt will creep in and whatever you do will be like a deflated balloon. Consistency is something that everyone needs to stick to, to. sustain habits that are beneficial for whatever we want to accomplish. Consistency gets rid of chaos and brings in order as well as a boost of confidence. And last but not least creating: I was created to create and not doing it would often create a big hole within me, a deep sense of feeling lost. What I don’t want to do is create for me, myself and the folders in my finder but create and share, create and publish, create and connect. Because what is the point of creating something no one else can enjoy?
Think about the year ahead, think about things you’ve been dragging along with you for years, things you most definitely need to throw out and get rid of. And then think of everything you want to let in to your home to not merely decorate your house with, but to use.
So, go ahead and make that list and work yourself through it one point at a time. We’ve got this!
Love,
Maame.
